What the hell?

OK, my day started out very strange. I woke up to my mother banging on my door at 7:15 asking if I was up. I NEVER sleep through my alarm. Especially when I have something important like work going on in the morning. I have a tendency to hit the snooze a dozen times, but I NEVER sleep through it. I went to bed last night around midnight which is early for me, so I had no excuse. Anyways, I hop up, throw on my best suit and blast on out the door. I hop in the Red Dragon and I'm off. About 5 minutes into the ride I realize that my transmission no longer overheats, but it's still pulling the same fucking bullshit it was before I brought it in. I was running around 3.5 to 4.5 thousand RPMs at 65mph. Now if I'm in a Honda, no big deal. I'm winding up a 5.9 liter, 360 cubic inch, V8 to that speed when it redlines at around 5.5 thousand. I switched off the overdrive and turned it back on to see if anything would change... no change. So now I had to get BACK on the phone to my parents to call my uncle to have them square this shit away. How hard is it to replace a broken piece with a shiny new one? Stupid fucks. At least I know my Uncle Russ will give him hell. He deserves it.

To premise this story, yesterday, Helder and I were picking up our company lunch thanks to the wonderful people at Phoenix and he said to me, "I never realized how big you were until I tried to walk around you to get a sandwitch. I kept walking and you were still in my way." I'm no skinny bitch, but I'm not a fat fuck by any means. I'm a healthy 315lbs (down from my fighting weight of 345lbs). So anyways, today I get into work at 10 to 9. I get in the elevator, get to the lobbey, and then get in the second elevator to get myself up to the 10th floor. A middle aged woman gets in with me and we stand on opposite sides. I'm on the left side of the elevator, just about in the middle, leaning on the wall to my left. She is standing close to the right wall. Standard opperating procedure so far. I hit 10 and she hits 6. We get to the 6th floor, the doors open, and she TURNS SIDEWAYS, says, "excuse me" and shuffles out like I'm blocking the door! I was so far from the door that you could have fit 10 more people in the elevator. I wasn't even close! She looked at me and thought I was so huge that she had to fucking turn sideways to get out the door! WTF? I was flattered, but regardless it was funny. I ended up picturing the person she saw in that elevator all day. I can only imagine how planet like you'd have to be to block that door if you were one of two people in the vader.

I took a bunch of tests today and didn't do as well as I had hoped. It's going to be a rough couple of weeks while I'm shining up my brain. I have all this shit up there, I just have to figure out how to get it all out.

I have to post this link because when drufus gets bored, cool shit happens. The last time he was bored he made himself a pimp cup(which you will find if you look closely). This time, he decided to make a video documentary of a day in his life. He filmed it all with his digital camera and hosted it on the web. It's not perfect, but it's a cool idea and if you can get past his disguisting fatbody in boxers, you'll get a kick out of it. NOTE: Because I don't feel like editing html to get the link small so it doesn't fuck up the look of the blog, it's been permalinked in the sidebar. You should be able to figure out which link is drufus's movie.